Ten must-fucking haves for fall/winter 2009/10!

What’s going down guys? It’s raining?  Back to school savings at ross dress for less?  Hot new fall lineup on CBS?

This is fuck’d and it means only one of two things… I need to get the right look or summer is over. Maybe both?

Fall is the season for losers but you can make the best of it by following this easy-to-use guide. Down here at the ReagBeag HQ we’ve compiled a secret list of how this shit gonna go down.

#1  POLAR BEARS !

Forget what you heard about sea lions being rad and regular lions  being the new “land seals”, I don’t know what I was thinking.

POLAR BEARS are to fall ’09 what regular bears and deers were to sping ’07.  Polar bear art, shirts, stories, songs and dreampants will be preoccupying a lot of time and energy from the coolguys that are in the know/now.

why only polar 'bears'? why not polar 'horses' too?

why only polar 'bears'? why not polar 'horses' too?

Also: Polar bears are the last animal that will be embraced by the alternative music community.

i will put all my VHS tapes and mp3s on this useful shelf.

i will put all my VHS tapes and mp3s on this useful shelf.

#2  CLAM CHOWDER

I cannot believe that I haven’t thought about clam chowder even once for like 4 months strong! My mind was clouded with ideas of shrimp cocktail and tropical sippers for so long this summer that I let it pass me by.

I suddenly have the urge to go to the Oregon coast and chug the fuck out of some decent chowder. Fuck it- I’d enjoy some steamed clams or any sort of seafeed about now.

I watched a nature show that said clams are gay.

gentleman's choice is a clam choice

gentleman's choice is a clam choice

#3  AUTUMN ROMANCE

With summer doing a wind down and temperatures falling we will be seeing less darlings sporting swimsuits. This means we’ll have to rely less on the looks of rad/tan bodies  when scouting for a new fall fox.

Now that I’m really thinking about it the change of seas is getting me fairly stoked. I hope my next GF wears nice sweaters and has a nice attitude.

let's reflect on this nice day before we make out

let's reflect on this nice day before we make out

leaves fallin'=panties droppin'

leaves fallin' = panties droppin'

#4  PRANKS WITH LEAVES

Yeah dig a giant hole in a public space like a jogging path and fill it with water and then put leaves on top!

Nobody will get mad and even doggies can share a laugh!

#5  A COOL NEW JACKET

A decent fall jacket is  a must if you’re gonna make a name for yourself in the community this autumn. Maybe I’ll wear this jacket when I wink at my new fall fox? Maybe will go on a date and she’ll have a nice jacket too? Maybe we’ll go to my house later and watch a romantic comedy on my dvd player? Wait a sec… I’m getting off track.

Get one that turns heads and keeps you warm.  It’s that easy.

don't go flashy with this lil ferrarri number...what? it came with the car bro.

don't go flashy with this lil ferrarri number...what? it came with the car bro.

go with a classy overpriced number from the dickhead store.

go with a classy overpriced number from the dickhead store.

#6  A USED SNOWMOBILE

Snowmobiles are the winter equivalent of ripping it up on a 3-wheeler! What else to say?

My friend kyle won’t shut up about how he had the time of his life on something called “snowmobile weekend” and he’s got me curious as fuck about this winter dream scene.

You can rent them or get a shitty one off cl.

what? this is supposed to go on snow? how did you lear to talk doggie? i am so stoned too...

what? this is supposed to go on snow? how did you learn to talk doggie? i am so stoned too...

#7  KNITTING

Okay this one for the ladies- Here at here at the Reag Beag we enjoy the shit out of hobbies and good deals and you should too.

I noticed a friend of mine knits up a storm and some pretty rad stuff with yarn and you should check it!http://heyshowmeyourknits.blogspot.com/

I think maybe yarn is free and knitting is so easy and maybe takes no time at all?

something about decent looking gals in neat sweaters kinda makes me want to go up their shirts(sweaters?)

something about decent looking gals in neat sweaters kinda makes me want to go up their shirts(sweaters?)

#8  AUTUMN MIX TAPE

Make a sweet mix tape that says ‘fuck summer’  and ‘these leaves are blowing my mind as much as these hot new indian rock songs!’

I will make a list of ten song to get you started a little later on today…. any ideas? not raps- i am a 32 year old man now.

get high and listen to tapes!

get high and listen to tapes!

#9  PUTTING WHISKEY INTO HOT CHOCOLATE

It’s fun and real easy!

It is the winter equivalent of pouring sparks into a big gulp cup.

let's chug these at work! ok bro!

let's chug these at work! ok bro!

#10  HBO

oh yeah -TV is for losers!

No. there’s some good TV programs on HBO… alot of rated R’s and  the best show ever- Curb your Enthusiasm  season 7 next week.larry-david

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~ by kybrandrew on September 7, 2009.

5 Responses to “Ten must-fucking haves for fall/winter 2009/10!”

  1. “Decent looking?” Thanks a lot. 😉 Like the list!

  2. nice one bro!

  3. ok- the internet’s prettiest sweaterfox! is that better?

  4. Is this what you have been working on since may?

  5. andrew? ky? yes. i have been working on this since may 06.

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